Cultivating Vulnerability

A loving relationship creates a container in which both people can become vulnerable confidants to one another.

It’s great for us to have other women friends as confidants for support. But more importantly, it’s crucial that you trust in your relationship enough for your partner to become your primary confidant.

This is where vulnerability shows up and the relationship is tested.

The relationship must cultivate space for vulnerability.

Creating a safe space for each partner to express all emotions whether they be happy or heavy is where authentic intimacy appears.

Only then can we truly show up authentically as ourselves in relationship and the integrity of the relationship deepens.

How do we cultivate space for vulnerability in relationship? By allowing your partner to show up authentically. This means:

• showing up in vulnerable ways ourselves without fear of how the other might react

• not judging the other when they show up hurt or angry but instead, allowing time and space for heavier emotions to flow through until more calmness can be reached for both

• allowing space and understanding for the other to make mistakes without attachment to the idea that we need to “fix” them

Of course, we must be very discerning when anger becomes violent or if the other is displaying patterns of emotional abuse towards us both of which are unacceptable.

However, if we can relax our judgements just enough to accept the other, flaws and all, we become an emotional confidant to the other and vice versa.

We then find peace and freedom within the partnership and we become empowered within unconditional love.